Half Baked is a phrase I use to describe an idea, or sometimes a constellation of ideas that may hang out together but don’t fully form a cohesive concept or, in this case, blog post. In light of the COVID pandemic, I am introducing “Half Baked in the Time of COVID” — my first foray back into blogging in over a year; an attempt to connect and share and engage. I hope you enjoy it.
I am not going to lie to you, I have had an incredibly, almost impossibly difficult last six months or so. It has been challenging in ways that I could not have anticipated or known, and I recognize that, as Charles Bukowski says, “what matters most is how you walk through the fire”. But I’ve been walking through fire for long enough that my feet are singed. My knees burn. I need a break.
The “fire” has kept me from doing things I genuinely enjoy, like writing for this blog. But the timing feels right to give it a go, and so here I am. As I decided to get back to writing, I went through some notes I had been taking on posts yet to write. And I found the story of a Lyft ride I took, now about two years ago.
On a sunny afternoon, I summoned a Lyft to take me to my motorcycle shop to pick up my bike. The car arrived quickly and the driver was a man with long braids and a lovely voice from whom I unexpectedly learned quite a lot.
We began in the casual conversation that one does when they ride in a taxi-cab or some such vehicle, but it was only a few minutes before I learned that the driver – I’ll call him Curtis – had moved here from Miami years ago. He had come to Los Angeles for a job that almost immediately unraveled. He was left in a new city, with no income, no job, and perhaps worst of all, no friends or family nearby. He decided not to call on his supportive family back home, to “see what [he] could do”. “Well”, he said good naturedly, “what I could do, was become homeless.”
Curtis had a van in which he lived, and utilized resources at a shelter where he started volunteering, then was paid as janitorial staff, and within a year had been promoted to a managerial position. Curtis had climbed out of a deep hole.
He laughed as he told me that “it may sound silly”, but he called on God and said, “I will give you 6 months of my life and I will surrender and show up. But I need your help. At the end of those six months, we will stay friends for life, or we’re parting ways.”
The thing is, they didn’t part ways. Curtis is married now, driving Lyft for extra income while he and his wife run a church in Malibu. We talked about kindness and love and what it means to open your heart to someone who you may not agree with or even know.
For me what really resonated was this idea of connecting to your spirit in times of crisis. I think it resonates because it is something I haven’t been doing for myself. I have not been filling the well, I’ve mostly been draining it. Or having it drained for me. But that doesn’t mean that I don’t have — that we all don’t have — choices. So a couple of weeks ago, I made the choice to start engaging in the practices that connect me back to myself: meditation, creativity, physical activity. It is only the end of week two and I feel more myself already.
So that’s the lesson, I think. Because right now and on a global scale, we are all walking through the fire. We are all feeling scared and uncertain. For many, there is the threat of tremendous financial impact, stress and hardship. But, like Curtis, we all get to make a choice. We get to see what we are made of, to connect to the people and practices that make us feel whole. We get to choose meaningful actions, whatever those may be, to fill the well that is daily being emptied by news reports of the rising numbers of positive tests and mortality rates.
As I sat there talking to Curtis, hearing his remarkable story, and connecting to this total stranger, I looked at his reflection in the rear-view mirror. Dangling from it was a small pink placard that read “Lyft”. That’s it. Right there. In a 10 minute car ride, I was “lyfted”. By connection and kindness and openness and yes, even love. Of this life, of the people I am lucky enough to meet and learn about and know. I believe this is possible for everyone. Even now, as we hunker down, stay “safer at home” and hope for safety and survival for those we know and those we don’t, I hope you will listen closely for the ways that the universe is reminding all of us that we are connected. I hope that we all choose to engage in the activities and practices that will help us all walk through this fire together.
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Lisa says
Beautiful! Welcome back and may you continue to deposit into your own bank.
lorelei bonet says
Thank you thank you for reading! It feels good to be back and I’m grateful for your support. I really am. Be well and stay safe out there!
jose says
Thanks for the beautiful writing and the thought that we all can make it with the right attitude.
Monika says
Thank you for being our Curtis.
lorelei bonet says
That’s very kind of you, Monika. Thank you for reading.
Niloo says
Lorelei, you did it again. Your writing always brings me to this place that feels so light and peaceful because of the way you tell the story. Your stories have so much depth. I am so glad you are back to writing. You were sent by the universe for all of us. You have a way to connect to everybody because you care. Thank you for being so humble and so real. I am sending you lots of positive energy and I am glad you are back to creativity since I have seen how talented you are 🙂
Catch you on your next blog. Be safe and stay healthy!
lorelei bonet says
Niloo, I miss you. Thank you for reading and for these kind, kind words. I am hoping that you are nurturing that creative spirit of yours, too.
Michael Eselun says
Beautiful, Madam! I also somehow missed the previous post about that sweater I love– so I got a jackpot today!
lorelei bonet says
Thank you, Michael!
Melanie says
I’m so glad you’re back. You’ve been missed. Big hug.
lorelei bonet says
Thank you, Melanie!
Erika says
It sounds like that Lyft ride you took when you met Curtis was meant to be. He seems like an incredible guy. I enjoy your thoughtful posts, and I’m so glad you’re back!
lorelei bonet says
Thanks, Erika!
Judy Herrick says
Just knowing that you were coming back brought a smile to my heart. Then when I read your words, I felt that those of us who read your posts from earlier years could now exhale. Thank you for coming back to us. Thank you for sharing your story of meeting Curtis.
I used to teach my students the story of how people walked around with a bucket. They could fill another person’s bucket with their kind words and actions. Those buckets are like your well. I am very happy for you that you are taking time to fill your well.
lorelei bonet says
Judy! I am so happy to see you here. I can’t tell you how good it feels to know that my words make a difference and that you look forward to hearing from me. I equally look forward to sharing with you. Thank you.
AGV says
Thank you for the reminder LB.
I love this story and I love what happens when we remain open.
(AND I am glad you are writing again.)
XO
lorelei bonet says
Thank you, friend. Glad to see you here.
Patty says
Happy Homecoming, LLB!! I’ve missed your posts and have thought of your blog often. Keep filling up that well, girl! Xx un abrazo
lorelei bonet says
I’m glad to be back, and glad to see you here. Thank you!